Broken Hearts and Misled Youths

.... and here I am, being as strong as ever, which is a first while I'm at home. It's actually a first in a long time. It feels good to be good.
The tempation I'm talking about is food. Normally on special occasions, such as a trip to see your family, [p.s. that's me and my goofy little sister on the right] one would allow oneself to eat whatever they wanted... Just for the weekend. But for me, it's not that easy.
I have binge eating disorder.
I eat until I can't breathe.
I know, it's disgusting, and I thought I would be the last person on the planet to ever contract an eating disorder, especially after what I went through to lose weight in a healthy and safe manner, thereafter deciding my major in school to be Kinesiology with an emphasis on Fitness and Nutrition, so that I may one day be a trainer to many, within my own gym. *sigh* but here I am, living it, breathing it, eating it... Dealing with it.
I was seeing a therapist, but I stopped... And the binging is starting to get better. Weird.
I just have to be strong, stay motivated, keep my eyes on my goal... To beat this. To be healthy. To lead a normal life... And hopefully, in the process, get back into the best shape I've ever been in.
Tomorrow, I expect, will be particularly difficult. My family just bought a $7,000 grill, and so we're having a fatty [pun intended] bbq. I'm nervous about seeing everyone, since I've gained weight since the last time I was home... But I'm trying to put that in the back of my mind and focus on catching up with everyone, being social, and keeping AWAY from the huge mounds of food.
Whenever I get tempted, I'll try to lock myself away in here and write. That seems to do the trick.
So, here's to a hopefully successful, stress-free bbq, family, and friends. Bon Apetit!